I just put on aface when the chubby guy in his 50s tore up my fifth revision of the proposal. I didn’t even glance at the torn paper that I worked on all night and kept me from sleeping for 2 whole days. Yes, 2 days, because 2 days ago I stayed up all night working on the fourth revision which also ended up in the trash.
“Are you an idiot or an idiot?” he said in a disdainful tone.
“I don’t know,” I replied nonchalantly. “You can’t read, you idiot,” I mumbled quietly.
“What were you talking about, huh?! Repeat loudly!” He roared and glared.
I just laughed sarcastically. “It’s stupid, stupid again. Poor thing.”
“Get out of my room! Don’t expect me to agree to your proposal!”
“You won’t get any money later, Pa,” I quipped in a low voice. The fat man immediately stuttered. Maybe confused what to say in self-defense. “Yes, I’ll say goodbye, Pa. Thank you,” I emphasized my last 2 words as I tore up a check containing Rp. 10,000,000.00 and threw it on the floor.
I stuffed my hands into the pockets of my bright green hoodie before exiting the spacious air-conditioned room in collusion with the stupid rich college students. 2 of my close friends were waiting outside, busy playing games on their phones.
“Let’s go back, I’m hungry,” I said simply and flatly.
The two of them didn’t say anything, just followed me as they continued to stare at their phones.
I walked to the cafe outside campus and ordered 2 portions of Nasi Padang and a glass of iced tea, then I kicked one of my stupid friends who was sitting right in front of me to order immediately.
“Relax, boss, there’s been a lot of domestic violence,” said Sam, the victim I just kicked. “I just satay, twenty skewers. Two rice. Drink water.”
He elbowed Gavin, my bespectacled friend, but it seemed too hard because his thin-rimmed round glasses nearly fell off. “Heh, this is expensive you know!” he shouted who immediately replied to Sam’s elbow. “I want fish n chips with lemonade.”
“Halah, already rich too,” sneered Sam.
“That’s all, Ma’am, hurry up, thank you,” I flashed a short smile at the poor ladies who had been standing at the end of our table for almost 10 minutes.
“Well, this one spreads charm but has no intention.” The noisy creature spoke again. “Why? The Moneymaker stole your money again? I told you not to give it.”
Gavin put his phone on the table, probably already lost. “What’s wrong with you? Obviously his proposal was rejected again.”
“Oh… then how are you doing, Dre?”
“I tore up the ten million check and threw it away in front of his eyes,” I said flatly.
“Wow… sadistic…” Sam commented, followed by Gavin’s laughter.
I just looked away, propping my chin on one hand. I’m so tired and have no interest in talking to anyone, not even my two best friends. The cool breeze slowly blowing started to make my eyelids heavy, and within seconds, I was asleep.
I woke up exactly 10 seconds later because Idiot Sam pulled the hand that supported my chin and made me hit the hard table.
I stared at him blankly and silently, ignoring his smug laugh.
“Sorry, Dre… you want to sleep at home, not a public place like this,” he said without any guilt.
“Eh, you idiot, can you be a little sensitive or not? He stayed up two days in a row!” said Gavin, hitting Sam on the head.
I stood up, carried my backpack, and immediately headed for my car which was in the campus parking lot. I ignored Gavin’s calls and Sam’s apologies. I’m tired.
I started my car as fast as I could. I don’t know how many cars I accidentally bumped into, but luckily I didn’t hit anyone. Once I arrived at the 2-storey rented house that we rented together, I just left my car in the carport without parking it neatly like I usually do. I was annoyed to see the white car parked sloppily, but I was too tired to fix it.
For the rest of the day, I locked myself in my room. I purposely brought a carton of mineral water, a dozen instant noodles, 5 cans of black coffee, an electric thermos, a fruit knife, and some fruit in the kitchen so I wouldn’t have to go out and meet those idiots. I don’t want to vent my frustration and tiredness on them.
Annoyed, I reworked the stupid proposal from scratch. I know there’s nothing wrong with my proposal, but I’ll rewrite it with some additional proposals to satisfy the mercenary man. Oh yes, the check earlier was genuine, but don’t worry, the money is mine. I would never have the heart to waste my parents’ money like that.
Gavin and Sam had banged on my door several times, calling my name in anxious voices. Gavin even said he left the 2 packets of Nasi Padang I ordered this afternoon at the door, which of course I didn’t even touch. Eating rice will make me sleepy. Instead, I took a bite of an apple without peeling it at all. His wryness helped wake my brain up, forcing it to work again.
At 1 am, I finished my third proposal. I pressed the “Save” button before opening my fourth coffee can and sipping its contents, also stretching my stiff body. I got up from my comfortable work chair, headed for the bathroom. I splashed cold water on my face. Surprisingly, I wasn’t even surprised. I glanced in the mirror and saw a very sad face: pale, exhausted, and sickly looking. Oh, whatever. I still look handsome even a little.
For a moment, I decided to rest. I turn on the phone that I’ve been turning off so there’s no barrage of annoying notifications. Of course, thousands of notifications from all over my social media started popping up and deafening my ears. I decided to check it out—in case Mama or Papa contacted me. My eyes widen when what I find are insults and insults from people I don’t even know. When I searched for the source, an irresponsible person revealed his private chat with me, where I seemed to be harassing him. The person admitted that he was only 16 years old and asked for justice to be served.
I DON’T EVEN KNOW HIM.
I did work as a YouTuber in between my studies, and well, lately the content I create is attracting quite a lot of people. My following grew so quickly that it must have had a huge impact on my finances. I love this job, but also hate it when strangers who hate me try to start a drama. Ah, no, rather, strangers trying to get attention.
I saw Gavin and Sam—who are also YouTubers—defend me and try to clear my name. I really appreciate their efforts, but talking too much will only make those who hate me happy. They get the attention they want.
Although normally I would silence people like this, I couldn’t take it anymore. I smashed that idiot through Twitter all-out. Luckily I still remember not to swear. Even so, I couldn’t help but look angry. I knew this afternoon I would get more blasphemy, but I didn’t care anymore. I tossed my phone away as soon as I finished typing, not caring if it broke.
I had a headache when I was about to go back to my desk. It didn’t just stop there, my stomach started to hurt. Oh shit. I think my stomach acid is rising.
Trembling, I walked towards the kitchen. There should be gastric medicine in there.
“Dre? Did you stay up late again?” Gavin’s voice came from behind me. The room is near here.
“Yes, I do,” I replied hoarsely.
“Have you eaten? Or are you looking for something to eat?” he asked.
“I need gastric medicine.”
Gavin sighed. “Andre, you need to eat, not ulcer medicine. I’ll heat your nasi padang, okay? Last night I put it in the fridge so it wouldn’t go stale. Have a seat over there.”
I ignored it. I rummaged through the first aid kit on the kitchen table. As soon as I got the medicine I wanted, Gavin held me off.
“Andre, I swear, if you continue like this, you’re going to be really sick,” he mumbled with an annoyed face mixed with worry.
I know what he said was true, but I was in a state of not wanting to be patronized at all. I stomped his hand before walking back to my room.
“Andre!” he pulled me again, this time so that my body jolted backwards and hit the marble kitchen counter—which must have been very hard. I looked at him annoyed while holding back the pain in my back. “Gosh, I’m sorry, Dre, I didn’t mean—”
“Can you just shut up, can you? Why don’t you two have enough to work with me? It’s nice that I’m stressed like this, huh?” I bark angry.
“Dre, I’m sorry. It’s not that I like seeing you like this, but—”
“BOOT! CAN YOU STAY OUT?!” I roared as I kicked his leg as hard as I could until Gavin fell down so hard. I tried to stand up even though my whole body felt so weak.
“What the hell?! You know, if you have a problem, tell me! If you’re just grinning haha-hihi all day, how do we know you’re in a bad mood?! You think you’re the only one who’s stressed?! THOSE FANTASTIC FANS MAKE ME DIzzy EVERY DAY!” he roared back and punched me after he managed to get back on his feet.
My breath started to hitch, out of control. I can’t control my anger anymore. I grabbed Gavin’s shirt collar and threw him against the marble table until he howled in pain. “FUCK YOU, FUCK!” curse. I grabbed his dark brown hair and banged his head repeatedly against the table.
“ANDRE! Good grief, Dre! That’s your own friend!” Sam, who might have woken up due to this commotion, immediately grabbed my hands from behind.
“Let go of me, you bastard! Don’t be so good at it!” I thrashed around uncontrollably.
“I swear what are you possessed, Dre?! Aware! This is Sam and Gavin! Your friend from the stone age!” Sam’s voice deafened my ears, making it ring painfully. “Vin, are you okay?”
There was only a groan of pain that answered Sam. That made Sam hurl me in the opposite direction from Gavin and toward the bespectacled guy. “Vin? Vin, don’t joke, Vin, I swear this isn’t funny…” Sam’s voice trembled.
I held on to the wall, trying to balance myself. My head feels dizzy. What was I doing? Wait, wasn’t I in the room? Why am I in the kitchen? I accidentally saw my palm covered with blood. Oh, that’s right. I had a fight with Gavin.
“Dre, do you know that?! You just killed your own best friend! FOR GOD WHY ARE YOU, DRE?! WHAT IS HE WRONG?!” Sam’s hands gripped my shoulders.
I looked at him flatly. Since when did I kill someone?What a joke. Bye, I want to go back.”
“Jeez, Andre, you didn’t even realize you killed Gavin?!” Sam’s grip began to hurt my shoulder. He stares at me blankly, then lets go of me a few seconds later to call someone.
I just stayed where I was. What did I do? As I recall I was editing the video… er, no. I’m working on a paper—wait, no. Argh. Ah, yes, I’m making a proposal. Then why am I in the kitchen…? Oh right, I need some medicine. Medication… nausea? But I don’t feel nauseous. I think I was just feeling dizzy. Did I come here to get an aspirin? I don’t think so. Ah, what am I actually doing?
Dazed, I decided to return to my room.
“Are you really crazy?” Sam’s trembling voice made me stop walking. His hands grabbed my hoodie and pulled me closer to him. “Why did you kill him huh? He’s the one who’s been worried about you the most, you know?! SHE WHO HEATS YOUR FOOD MANY TIMES AND POSTS THAT FOOD AT YOUR DOOR ONCE EVERY HOUR! AND YOU EVEN KILL HIM?!”
“Noisy. Why are you screaming incoherently,” I grumbled lazily before yawning.
Suddenly, Sam punched me in the face. “I swear I don’t know you anymore.”
My tongue tasted a strong metallic taste. “What do you want?” I asked in a raised voice. “Who did I kill? I’ve never killed anyone!”
“You killed Gavin, you idiot! This corpse is in front of your eyes!”
“Gavin is in his room, you idiot! I just played with him earlier!”
Sam suddenly punched me in the stomach, almost making me throw up. “BE AWARE, DRE! THIS IS REALITY! NOT A DREAM!”
My anger peaked again. I quickly grabbed a knife by the stove before Sam could punch me again and kick his leg. As soon as he fell to his knees, I stabbed the object into his neck repeatedly. “I TOLD YOU I NEVER KILL ANYONE!”
I stabbed the thing with all my might one last time after Sam had stopped struggling. The dizziness came back to my head. The pain in my stomach began to surge and prompted me to vomit whatever I ate today. I hurriedly ran to my room, went into the bathroom, and threw up in the toilet. I noticed my bright green hoodie getting wet and red. I don’t think I’ve ever spilled paint. Have any of my clothes faded?
I opened it and threw it straight into the laundry basket. Looks like I have to take a shower. It’s still late, maybe I can broadcast live for a while. Maybe I can get Sam and Gavin to play together too. I don’t think they’re home yet. I’ll call them later. I’m trying to remember my assignment for tomorrow. I feel like I have an assignment to write a paper or something… or a proposal huh?
I stood still in my place. What am I doing here?